I chose to run my first ultramarathon on one premise:

I chose to run my first ultramarathon on one premise:
No accidental signups.

I'd heard countless finishing stories of accidental, last minute, or drunken signups for races of shorter distances. No such stories of first ultramarathons (races of 31 miles or more).

The word ultra is a warning label, a promise of suffering.
We expect extreme... pain, doubt, and resistance. We know there’s a price to pay in time, energy, and sacrifice for the even the chance of finishing.

Now, I participate in a few such events per year. I'm struck by how much the mental fortification required to finish compares to my roles as a spouse, parent, and entrepreneur. It VERY similar.

They share many of the same elements but there are some crucial differences.

First: there’s no waiver.
People stumble into marriage, parenting, and entrepreneurship every day. No training plan. No orientation.
Have a pulse? Please proceed.

Second: the damage isn’t isolated.
In running, the aches, blisters, and chaffing are mine to live with.
But at the core of marriage, parenting, and entrepreneurship is a relationship.
Damage impacts multiple people (and doesn't heal from ice and Advil).

Third: you can half-ass it.
In an ultra, there are cutoff points. Miss one and get escorted off the course.

Life offers no such mercy.
We can coast, showing up but not really there, until what remains is a hollow, zombie-like version of something that used to matter.

I’m not sure what to do with this observation.

Maybe my wish is simply that these demanding, impactful roles (marriage, parenting, leadership)... get more honest marketing.

Not to glorify them.
To tell the truth.

And maybe protect a few accidental signups from getting crushed by the ultra of human experiences.